Have you ever experienced psilocybin?
Personally, I did it as part of my studies in transpersonal psychology, and it greatly broadened my horizons. During one of these inner journeys that this substance allows, I relived the story of my ancestors, men who came from northern Europe, seeking to conquer new territories. They settled in Spain three or four generations ago, attracted by the hope of new lands at the end of the 19th century, fleeing poverty for Algeria. In my vision, these men were warriors, and they settled in this burning land, with its intense colors.
Follow the call of the roots
Following this experience, I decided to continue my nomadic life, with the intuition that it was time to reconnect with my roots. So I headed to Valencia, where I immediately felt at ease. I wanted to reconnect with my roots.
Invisible heritage and multiple lineages
We all belong to an ancestral lineage, carrying values, even if we did not personally know those who came before us. Within the same family, several lineages coexist, coming either from the father, the mother or their parents, and within a sibling group, some may identify with different currents, explaining the divergences within the same family.
Inherited wounds and the search for meaning
We all inherit the values of the ancestral lineage to which we belong, but also its unresolved wounds or traumas. For astrology followers, it is the asteroid Chiron that indicates where this wound lies. In my birth chart, Chiron is in the first house, suggesting a journey of self-discovery.
I had to confront the restrictions of my childhood, in an environment marked by fear and war, which forced me to withdraw into myself. Unconsciously, I searched for a personal meaning to my existence, which resulted in missions in developing countries. But since this spiritual journey under psilocybin, I have felt the need to travel no longer for professional reasons, but to discover myself, share my experience, and help all those in search of identity.
A family memory erased
I didn't know any of my ancestors directly; I barely remember my paternal grandmother, who died in a hospice. My grandfathers died before I was born, as a result of the First World War, and I was too young to remember my maternal grandmother, who died when I was two.
I know nothing about their birthplaces. The little information I could gather comes from my parents' birth certificates, which are difficult to read and provide no specific information about my grandparents, aside from their Spanish-sounding names. My mother told me they emigrated from Spain, from the Valencia and Ibiza regions, in the 19th or early 20th centuries. This is why I find myself in Spain today, retracing my steps in reverse.
Finding the land of one's ancestors: between fantasy and reality
For a long time, I felt reticent about this country, imagining its reactions as extreme. With its motto "blood and gold," it seemed to me that Spain's history was marked by violence, materialized through sometimes bloody conquests.
I needed to discover how much of this representation was dream or reality. Would I recognize myself in this modern Spain, which I had heard so much about in my youth?
Becoming who we are
Connecting with your lineage allows you to know who you are, understand the values you hold dear, and find your place. In other words, knowing who you are in order to become who you want to be. This involves acceptance, research, listening, constant questioning, and humility.
An open quest
I don't know what I'll find on this journey, but probably a part of myself. I only know that with the beginning of this third phase of my life, it was necessary to set out to discover my past.
EN 
FR